We’re back again this week with the second part of mailbag Q&A. Let’s get into it!
Nora asks: “Thoughts about the thrift shop piece flipping trend that’s popular on depop/posh lately? Some argue it prevents those who rely on thrifted clothes from accessing anything nice when kids come in and buy all the good pieces up?”
It’s super shitty! It feels like an extension of the fashion gatekeeping we’ve seen online — rich kids buying bots to purchase up Supreme and Nike drops — but offline instead. Part of the thrifting experience is in the thrill of the hunt, but you’re definitely less inclined to dig through racks during a pandemic if it’s all just going to end up on third-party sites after the fact!
I still think there are good things to find, but it makes the hunt for those remaining items that much more difficult if all the quality (regardless of brand) stuff is gone before those who need it can have it. I don’t know how you even begin to tackle an issue like this — Supreme and Nike seemingly don’t have an answer either. It just feels kind of insurmountable in an unbelievably depressing way.
Mandy asks: “Do you believe in workplace-appropriate clothing (or dress codes), or is this unnecessary red-tape? What about other event/location-specific codes of dress?”
I think dress codes in professional workplaces are kind of bullshit! I’ve always believed in the idea that you should wear whatever you want to work as long as you feel comfortable in it. Granted, I’d say certain subsets of clothing, like sleep pants, for example, are probably off the table here. But if you feel comfortable working in track pants and a tee-shirt, why not? As long as you get your work done, it shouldn’t matter what you work in, especially if you’re not client-facing. I understand why they exist — companies want to maintain a specific image, and so they force this upon their employees — but this Atlantic piece from Amanda Mull from last year makes a damn good case as to why they should disappear post-pany.
I tend to adhere to event-specific dress codes, however. Half the reason I like going to formal occasions is because of the opportunity they provide to dress in formalwear that otherwise gathers dust in my closet. In these types of situations, I find it best to adhere to whatever the rules are, but find ways to tweak the dress code to better match your personality. For example: Going a black-tie wedding? Maybe your bow-tie is slightly larger than a standard tie, or you wear some loafers with an atypical texture. There’s space to dance between the raindrops; it’s just a matter of bending the rules without breaking them.
Mags asks: “If you're a capsule wardrobe kind of person, is there a way to participate in trends without remorse?”
I was initially confused by this question because I wasn’t exactly sure what Mags meant by “capsule wardrobe” and thought it meant dressing from one designer’s collection exclusively. I was half right; it means dressing in classic styles and/or colors.
For me, it’s essential to try and incorporate any trend into your wardrobe and your fits sparingly. If you’re used to dressing all in one silhouette or color, suddenly diving into florals or something might not work for the look you’ve previously cultivated! My approach is to slowly but surely begin working new elements into existing looks. This will help you get a feel as to whether or not it works for you and provides an excellent foundation to then build upon. Does that floral top work well with the rest of your capsule outfit? Great! Then you know you could easily add another floral element if you wanted. But I think the key is to start small and then go big. I know there have been moments where I get caught up in one particular trend and end up doing too much, resulting in being left with a bunch of pieces I don’t like and won’t wear again. There’s also an element of knowing yourself: if you’re not an inherently flashy dresser, maybe it doesn’t make sense to jump into a particular showy trend. I think half of dressing well is knowing what will or won’t work for you. And if you’re not sure what that is, well, some slight experimentation is a smart way to sort through it.
Catherine asks: “How do I bring maximalism to everyday outfits?”
Much like the question Mags asked, I think the key is not to go too overboard. Start small and then build. If you’re used to wearing pretty traditional looking clothes, there’s a good chance you’ll feel a little unsure of how an outfit looks if you go too far the other way. Instead, start to incorporate showier pieces into looks you know already work. Outerwear is a great place to start because half the time, you’re just wearing a jacket or a coat to keep warm. You’ll get that bold look, but you’re not necessarily married to it all day in the same way you might be with pants or a shirt because you can just take it off if it’s not working. I think once you feel comfortable, it’s then easy to start adding more and more to what you’re already wearing.
I know that sometimes I’ll dip into bolder looks if I’m having a bad day because it’s energizing to wear fun clothes! But I know that not everyone wants to make a statement in this particular way, so I think that’s something to consider.
Paul asks: “What advice do you have from the perspective of being a tall man?”
I’m going to assume this means fashion advice specifically and, like, life advice — of which I’m ill-suited to offer.
In addition to having most of my height in my legs, my arms are also rather lanky, which makes finding pants, shirts, and jackets that are long enough a huge challenge. Most stores don’t sell anything longer than a 34 inseam (even online!) which makes it difficult to have pants that feel like they break the right way. Being tall and being into fashion is often a game of compromises; you start to realize there are some trends you can’t fully indulge in without looking like a clown.
The flip side to this is finding out what does work for you. There’s some freedom, if I can call it such, in working within constraints. Plus, I’m really aware of what my exact measurements are, which makes it easier when I’m searching for clothing on sites like Grailed or eBay; there’s no need to buy something, and just hope it’ll turn out okay, as I can ask for sizing and instantly know if it’ll fit my torso, arms, or legs. I’ve shopped around quite a bit to get a good sense of what fast-fashion places work for me, which takes out some of the additional guesswork. Honestly, having fewer options probably works in my favor considering how obsessive I am about clothing.
Keith asks: “They say "Dress for the job you want." I'd like to dress like a successful freelance writer but fear my current wardrobe (often Star Wars and/or podcast t-shirts under a long sleeve button down shirt) says "Unsuccessful freelance writer." What should I do?”
Keith, you are a successful freelance writer! But if you’re looking to freshen your wardrobe up to ensure you feel like one too, I would recommend maybe ditching the t-shirt and just wearing the button down shirt instead. I think this will would produce a more polished look overall than what you might get if you’re layering a shirt over a graphic tee. If you’re looking to still wear an undershirt of some kind, Uniqlo’s AIRism undershirts are light, breezy, and very comfortable while still providing you with the kind of base layer support you might be used to having. The brand offers both crewneck and v-neck shirts, depending upon preference.
If you’re layering under your button down for warmth, considering layering over instead! A simple sweater or cardigan (I’ll recommend Uniqlo again) not only adds warmth but adds just a subtle touch of elegance and will make your sartorial looks as sophisticated as your take on Tenet.
Dane asks: “Why don’t so many brands include the rise measurement on their pants? Is there a trick to finding pairs that will properly fit someone with a long torso?”
I took a look quick look at a few different retailers — Uniqlo, Gap, American Eagle — and the only place that offered any sort of rise measurement was Uniqlo (not shocking, as I think the brand goes out of its way to provide excellent sizing information and is one of the many reasons I truly love the brand so much). Prior to this question, I had no idea this was such a major issue.
In the same way I had to try on so many different pants in order to figure out which ones were long enough, it looks like there’s some element of trial and error here too. It’s really frustrating, I wish fashion was better about sizing in so many ways. I’ve certainly vented about my issues with the “Big and Tall” section before, but big retailers seemingly go out of their way to make shopping difficult nowadays. That’s such a bad consumer experience and only adds another barrier to entry for those who want to try and dress stylishly. I’d recommend trying to find brands who do go out of their way to provide this information — because they’re more than likely a smaller brand who absolutely deserve your time, attention, and (ultimately) money for being more consumer-friendly.
Measurements are a good place to end on for this week, as next time, I’m going to go deep on the process of what it was like for me to try and create a piece of my own.
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